It’s the most wonderful time of the year…..

It’s all about perspective, isn’t it?  When you’re a kid, it’s pretty spectacular. Chocolate, lollies and snacks at every turn. Gifts from mum, dad, all your aunties and uncles and from some total stranger who breaks into your house to leave them every December 24th. As you get older, the magic is still there, if you want it to be. But no matter how hard you hit the Bublé , baubles and bubbly, there’s still one looming monster that requires your attention. It’s where a Christmas gift guide can come in kinda handy, so, you’re welcome!

via GIPHY

 

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Underwear fetish

Everyone has their kinks, their turn-ons, that thing that sets their motor running in some way. Feet, latex, BDSM, role play- you name it and someone is probably into it.

An underwear fetish of some sort is probably one of the more common not-so-guilty pleasures. Seeing people wearing it, wearing it yourself (the fancy kind, I imagine, not your sensible knickers reserved for periods) or, for some, touching it. To each their own, right? No judgement here. Except for the person that once stole my fancy, expensive satin knickers off the washing line. That was many moons ago and they were a scant bit of shimmer that left nothing to the imagination. Now that I think about it, they could have just blown away in a gust of wind. If someone took it upon themselves to pinch them off the line, however,  I am judging. Just on the stealing, just so we are clear. I don’t blame them for liking the teensy pants. They were HAWT. But, I digress.

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The other common underwear fetish is going completely without them. Freeballing, for those with a certain anatomy. No knickers at all, for the rest of us.

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All the good men, where are you?

I don’t mean the good men that rush the comments in every article detailing yet another sexual assault, yet another rape, yet another woman murdered. Only to proclaim themselves “good men” because “not all men” blah blah blah.

If talking about toxic masculinity in the context of another raped or murdered woman only makes you desperate to distance yourself from those men, you’re not a “good man”. You’re a derailer. The woman who has been harmed or killed means less to you than your own ego. You’re not interested in getting to the core of the problem or bringing about change. Just in letting everyone know that you don’t assault or kill women. You, personally, aren’t responsible. And there are so many of you out there, pleading to distance yourself from those men, that there are now women who’ve taken up your cause. They, like you, forget about the number of women being sexually harassed, stalked, abused, beaten, raped and killed. The literal body count is ignored while they point out the bleeding obvious.

If we are talking about violent men and you, your son, your best mate, your partner or whoever else you have in mind is not a violent man, good! No one is saying otherwise.

But that doesn’t make a man “good” by default. Not being a violent prick is not enough, my dudes. You NOT assaulting, molesting, harassing or murdering people does not earn you the title of “good man” if it stops there. That is nothing but a baseline for civil decency. You don’t get accolades for NOT committing crimes.

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