The news broke last week about the discovery of a website where teenage boys had been sharing photos of female teens naked, partially naked or engaged in sexual activity. 70+ schools were identified by journalist Nina Funnell, who painstakingly went through the website, cross -referencing names and schools listed. Not only did she uncover existing images and identifying information but she found “hit lists” where users were posting the names of girls they wanted to obtain photos of, encouraging others to “hunt” for them and offering trades. Some pictures were stolen, some coerced, some taken without permission. The website has reportedly been taken down but it isn’t the only one of its kind, nor is it likely to stay gone.
I want to introduce you to my friend, Bruce.
Bruce has always been one of those “career men”, so he was in his late twenties when he eventually got married. It wasn’t only his career holding him back from a life of wedded bliss, though. You see, Bruce is actually a really smart guy. Past experience had taught him that his intelligence would be a turn off to most women. They don’t want a man who challenges their opinions of knows more about politics than they do, right? However, while on a boys night out, Bruce’s best friend once said something to him that was a bit of a revelation. He said “Bruce, there are women out there that are actually attracted to intelligent men. A woman like that would really appreciate you.” Bruce soon stopped “dumbing it down” for the ladies and although it probably meant he was on the shelf a bit longer than some men, it was worth it when he met his wife, Camilla.
(Taps mic, clears throat)
“Hi, everyone. My name is Amy and I own a thermomix and I’m not in the least bit sorry.”
I know it’s kinda fashionable at the moment to roll ones eyes and shake one’s head at thermomix owners. I also know that owning a thermomix and being a dick aren’t mutually exclusive things. My own research has shown that this kitchen appliance does not actually cause one to become a dick. In fact, evidence suggests that being a dick is likely a pre-existing condition. This is also demonstrated by the fact that non-thermomix owners can be just as dickish as thermomix owners. The appliance is not the cause. This is the first rule of sciencing, guys: Correlation does not equal causation!