Resolution thingies

I’m not a big one for New Year’s resolutions, or setting intentions or even picking a word or mantra.

Sometimes, however, I set something for myself. I’m not strict about it and I don’t usually make it something terribly difficult. One year it was to get myself to the dentist and I did it. Go me! Another was to stop calling everyone “guys” because, you know, some people aren’t guys and it’s nice to be inclusive.

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Underwear fetish

Everyone has their kinks, their turn-ons, that thing that sets their motor running in some way. Feet, latex, BDSM, role play- you name it and someone is probably into it.

An underwear fetish of some sort is probably one of the more common not-so-guilty pleasures. Seeing people wearing it, wearing it yourself (the fancy kind, I imagine, not your sensible knickers reserved for periods) or, for some, touching it. To each their own, right? No judgement here. Except for the person that once stole my fancy, expensive satin knickers off the washing line. That was many moons ago and they were a scant bit of shimmer that left nothing to the imagination. Now that I think about it, they could have just blown away in a gust of wind. If someone took it upon themselves to pinch them off the line, however,  I am judging. Just on the stealing, just so we are clear. I don’t blame them for liking the teensy pants. They were HAWT. But, I digress.

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The other common underwear fetish is going completely without them. Freeballing, for those with a certain anatomy. No knickers at all, for the rest of us.

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Internet Dating

When I met my now-husband, it was over a decade ago on an online dating site. This was well before Tinder and the like and right in the middle of the time that internet dating was kinda new. New and regarded with suspicion. We went to a party once and people asked us how we met. He said “Actually, we met online.” The silence was deafening. People looked shocked and kinda uncomfortable. I said “We’re gonna come up with a better story than that, though!”

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Over a decade later, we never did come up with a better story. Not a credible one, anyway. And nowadays, online dating is pretty standard. What can I say, we’re early adopters. So when my friend, let’s call her Jane, decided to dip her toes back in the dating pool, I was all for it. Jane left an unhappy marriage several years ago. She focused on raising her kids, relocating and finding a new community. And recently, she decided she was ready to maybe meet someone new.

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If you ever wade into the comments sections, you’ll know how easy it is to despair at the world.

An article on the gender pay gap will show you some people denying it even exists. A compilation of statistics about violence against women will have commentary ranging from the victim blamers to the what-about-men derailers. If you see a video about children and gender stereotyping, there will almost always be people complaining about the idea of gender neutrality. An article about racism will be peppered with remarks from those who think it isn’t an issue (or worse, those that embrace it). The same goes for anything online that is shared to do with sexism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism or any other form of human bigotry.

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